TV

Zach Braff Performed A ‘Scrubs’ Script Written By A Bot And It’s Perfect

"A hospital's a lot like a high school. An amazing man is dying, and you're the only one who wants to steal stuff from his dad."

Scrubs Zach Braff

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Zach Braff has resurrected Scrubs protagonist John Dorian just in time for the holidays.

The actor took to Twitter late last week to share a video of himself reciting one of JD’s patented monologues. You know, the long speeches at the end of every episode that hamfistedly tie up all of that week’s plot threads into something vaguely resembling a thematic package?

What’s different this time is that the monologue was written by a bot that was trained on the show’s old scripts. It was created by the team at Botnik Studios, who were also responsible for that insane Harry Potter chapter (which you should definitely read).

“I don’t really understand how, but a group of people taught their robot computer how to write a Scrubs episode,” explains Braff. “And um, it’s kind of beautiful and brilliant, in it’s own way.”

He’s not wrong.

“The truth is, every patient suffers from dementia,” the monologue begins. “I’m not going to change all that. After all, the right thing’s not always the best thing to do. You’d know that if you worked in a hospital. What is a hospital? A hospital’s a lot like a high school. An amazing man is dying, and you’re the only one who wants to steal stuff from his dad.”

Watch the rest below:

Couple of things here. Firstly, Scrubs may have been off the air for a while, but I’ll be damned if Braff doesn’t slip back into character like it was yesterday. Secondly, you’ve got to admit, that monologue is pretty bang on. Swap Dr Tapioca for Dr Mickhead and you could definitely put this on air.

It’s even more uncanny when you see it played over footage from the show.