At some stage in our uni career, we all get it in our minds that we desperately want a HD.

“Just one”, we think. “And then we’ll be content with credits and Ps for the rest of uni.” We just want to show ourselves (*cough* our parents) that we have the wherewithal and patience to get there. We’ve been scraping by on minimum effort, imagine if we actually tried.

And while it’s admirable to reach for the stars, the reality of actually trying to get a HD is way harder than you think.

Expectation: I’ll Start As Soon As I Get The Quesion

Reality: You’re One Week Out And You Haven’t Even Looked At The Essay Question

How did your hopes for a HD dwindle so quickly? Why didn’t you do the ONE requirement needed to kick start this stellar GPA journey?

Lo and behold, you’re struggling like crazy to get an entire research essay finished in ONE WEEK. Why do you do this to yourself?

Expectation: I’ll Have A Quick Gander At This Past Paper That Scored A HD

Reality: What The Fuck Do These Words Mean?

Having a look at a past paper that scored a really good mark seems like a good idea. But every time you do, you’re just left feeling inadequate and confused.

Past papers were written by fancy robots created to make us feel bad about ourselves. And we won’t believe any different. Yes, they may give us a few handy tips on structure but honestly, at what cost?

Expectation: I’ll Speak To Other People Who Got HDs And Do Exactly What They Did

Reality: Oh God, Fuck That

If you speak to someone who actually received a HD you’ll realise they did one of two things: 1) worked tirelessly to produce a piece of flawless work, or 2) got extremely lucky.

Due to the extreme unlikeliness of you being able to achieve either of those things, you just end up deciding it’s not worth it. Ps get degrees, am I right?

Expectation: People Will Be So Impressed About Your HD

Reality: “That’s Nice, Sweetie.”

When you finally FINALLY get that holy grail of a mark, you just assume everyone will understand how big of a deal it is. “It’s not just a distinction, it’s a HIGH distinction,” you aggressively stress to your friends and family. And as much as they say “nice work buddy”, it’ll never be enough to make up for the long hours, the stress, the self-doubt and energy drinks you poured into that mark.

But it’s OK. You get it. You know. Pat yourself on the back, pal. You did good.

(Lead image: How I Met Your Mother/CBS)