This Remix Of George Brandis’ Trainwreck ‘Metadata’ Interview Is All You Need To Hear

George Brandis may not know anything about the Internet, but he knows how to lay down some sick rhymes.

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Two days ago, the government announced its intention to telco providers to retain Internet user’s metadata for up to two years because Terrorism, and was immediately hit by a barrage of criticism along the lines of “that won’t work”, “that’s completely fucked” and “you literally opposed this exact policy two years ago”.

Last night Attorney-General and boiled egg George Brandis went on Sky News to clarify exactly what information the government was interested in looking at, and it became glaringly obvious that he knows roughly as much about the basic elements of a major policy he’s trying to implement as you do about quantum particle physics (which, incidentally, is a thing I made up just now. Sounded real, though, didn’t it).

Snippets from the interview are already doing the rounds on major news websites, but heroic YouTuber How To Democracy has gone one step further and spliced together all of Brandis’ “umms”, “ahhs”, “wh-wh-what we’re doings” and “looks” into a gorgeous two-minute vignette of ministerial incompetence and Boomer kids-these-days grouchiness.

Here it is mashed up with some smooth, soulful jams courtesy of Dutch Connection Combo and FBi Spin the Bottle host/absolute legend Avani Dias.

It’s actually kind of catchy.