The New Trailer For Sofia Coppola’s ‘The Bling Ring’ Makes Us Want To Watch It Harder

Perhaps proving the nutso extent to which people are anticipating its release, last month’s first look at Sofia Coppola’s The Bling Ring sparked an awful lot of Hermione sexy-dancing gifs. Yes, we felt creepy looking at them, but WE COULDN’T STOP. Thankfully, to ease our shame a touch, the new trailer was released today. Look at it!

Starring Emma Watson and Leslie Mann, The Bling Ring is based on the true story of a group of fame-obsessed California teens who robbed close to $3 million worth of goodies from the homes of Hollywood celebs like Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan and Orlando Blooom back in 2008 and 2009. If you haven’t already, check out Nancy Jo Sales’ Vanity Fair article — ‘The Suspects Wore Louboutins’ — for a detailed (and highly readable) account of the incidents. But first!

The five best moments from the new The Bling Ring trailer:

1. The sexy-dancing scene.

It’s now soundtracked to Azealia Banks’ ‘212’. Somehow, this makes it even creepier, so I’m not going to look at it anymore.

2. “Oh my God, there’s Paris Hilton! There’s Kirsten Dunst.”

These are some impressive cameos from famous people personally affected by this weird real-life crime. It’s kinda like when Alice Cooper played himself in Wayne’s World? I don’t really know what I’m trying to say.

3. The inside look into Paris Hilton’s wardrobe and bedroom. 

Does Paris Hilton really have her face emblazoned all over her cushions in real-life? I mean, Coppola’s notoriously ‘impressionistic’ with facts, if you remember those pink Converse in Marie Antoinette, but we’d believe it.

4. Emma Watson, the jerk child.

Emma Watson’s satirical evisceration of bratty American kids (“I think this situation is a huge learning lesson for me, to grow and expand as a spiritual human being…”), with a face full of  smug, fake piety, looks quite impressive. Who knew Hermione could do that? 5 stars.

5. “Giiiiiiiirls! Time for your Adderall!”

That part at the beginning when ‘Mom’ (Leslie Mann) yells “Giiiiiiiirls! Time for your Adderall!” Oh man, rich people.

The film’s due to open locally sometime ’round August. In the meantime: “Giiiiiiiirls! Time for your Adderall!”