Chris Zou Would Like Australians To Feel Less Irrelevant

I’m not sure about you, but I continue to think about Chris Zou, the exhausted Sydney WorldPride tourist, all the time. 

Thankfully, Chris has revealed that he still thinks about us too. In particular, he’s reflected on achieving infamy among Australians for saying that we have a unique aptitude for non-stop party schedules that include “pre-party, a day party, a night party, kick-ons, [and] an after-party” aided by swigs of Hydralyte and zero sleep. (I can’t relate, but we contain multitudes, do we not?)

Two months later, Zou has taken to TikTok once again, but this time he’s theorising that his videos went off because Australians have a misplaced inferiority complex.

“I have been told by a number of my Australian friends,” Zou says, his head peeking out from his doona, “Australians really like it when you talk about them, because people don’t really talk about them.”

“I don’t know where you guys get this impression from, because the world definitely talks about Australia way more than they talk about us here in Canada.”

“Maybe Australians have a little bit of a complex here, because they are so far away from everyone else, maybe they don’t know what everyone else thinks of them.”

He goes on to reassure viewers that North Americans are taught at school that Australia is “special” as it’s because a continent and a country, and that Australia’s coral reefs are constantly brought up as a reason to care about climate change. Finally, he says that the rest of the world tends to look at Sydney to make sure “everything’s going to be OK” when the new year rolls in. “When Australia starts sinking when it hits 2024, we’re all getting the fuck out of here,” he explains.

He also waxes lyrical about the chokehold that Australian music has on the music industry. “Every few years [Australia] keeps releasing these bombs to the world,” he adds, and do you hear that, Azealia Banks? He then recites a list of global hits by Australian artists including Kylie Minogue’s ‘I Can’t Get You Out Of My Head’, Gotye’s ‘Somebody That I Used To Know’, ‘Fancy’ by Iggy Azalea, and the 2022 hit ‘Stay’ by The Kid LAROI and Justin Bieber. (“Justin… Justin is ours though,” he concedes).

“You guys really need to have more faith in yourselves, because you guys really do have influence on the rest of the world.”

“So mate, mate, you don’t need to be uplifting the strange Asian man in Toronto,” he urges, “for bringing visibility to Australia. You guys are already seen!”

Watch Chris’s pep talk to our insecure island nation below.