Culture

Chris Pratt’s Accent Has Only Gotten Worse In New ‘Super Mario Bros Movie’ Trailer

While Princess Peach looks poised to peg the patriarchy, Chris Pratt's Mario voice is making us nervous.

by Charles Rushforth  30 November 2022

Want more Junkee in your life? Sign up to our newsletter, and follow us on Instagram and Facebook so you always know where to find us.

A fresh trailer for the upcoming Super Mario Bros Movie has landed, and while it hasn’t assailed our fears about Chris Pratt’s second-rate Italian accent, we’re still getting a little bit excited.

Related
Sydney Gets Its Time On The Small Screen In New ‘Mario Kart’ Track

The phrase ‘once bitten, twice shy’ sums up video game giant Nintendo’s reluctance to put everyone’s favourite moustached plumber in a movie after the disaster that was the 1993 Super Mario Bros film.

But, with the help of animation studio Illumination, Nintendo is placing all of Yoshi’s eggs in a basket for the animated reboot of the series, The Super Mario Bros Movie. 

Now with the release of a second trailer from the film, we’ve got plenty more details about the Mario Cinematic Universe that lies before us!

Mamma Mia! Chris Pratt’s Mario Accent Sucks

There’s a funny anecdote from the making of DreamWorks’ Shrek, where midway through production actor Mike Myers decided that the titular protagonist needed a Scottish accent, ultimately costing the studio millions of dollars in re-animation fees.

Nintendo are at risk of experiencing their own million-dollar voice acting fumble, following widespread condemnation after casting actor Chris Pratt as the voice of the iconic Italian plumber.

While there isn’t much of Pratt’s Mario voice to judge in the tiny snippets of dialogue shown in recent trailers, what we have heard is simply very bad. It’s essentially another stale rendition of the cutesy Chris Pratt Voice™ the actor trots out when playing an unlikely hero, with the inclusion of a faint Italian inflection in the case of Mario’s iconic catchphrases ‘Wahoo’ and ‘Let’s a Go!’.

But as concern about Pratt’s accent grow with each passing trailer, some have suggested that foreign-dubbed versions of film could be an excellent option for those looking for a better-voiced Mario.

I mean, tell me that Brazil isn’t completely crushing it with their rendition of the portly plumber.

Peach Moves On From Being A Damsel In Distress

A moment of silence for Princess Peach, a video game character who has failed the Bechdel test more times than all of Judd Apatow’s female characters combined.

However, it looks like the directors of The Super Mario Bros. Movie are planning on shaking up the video game’s usual plot trajectory, which almost always kicks off with the Mushroom Kingdom princess being kidnapped by perennial villain King Bowser.

Speaking in the Nintendo Direct livestream, Mario creator Shigeru Miyamoto let slip that audiences can expect to see a “new side to Princess Peach” in the upcoming film.

Voiced by Anya Taylor-Joy, Princess Peach looks like she ain’t going anywhere without a fight in the new trailer, shown deftly wielding a halberd as she defends her kingdom.

Let’s hope for Peach’s sake that Taylor-Joy’s rendition of the monarch can launch a blue shell at the patriarchy.

Donkey Kong Is Confirmed, But Where On Earth Is Waluigi!?

Of course, it wouldn’t be a Mario movie without series anti-hero Donkey Kong showing up. Essentially the MCU’s equivalent of the Incredible Hulk, Donkey Kong satisfyingly smashes eight different grades of shit out of Mario in the latest trailer.

Despite being voiced by Seth Rogan (what?), we’re glad that minor characters like Donkey Kong will make an appearance in the movie. Given the vastness of the Mario galaxy, it begs the question of where the studio will draw the line when it comes to including characters from previous games.

While the Mario and Luigi doppelgängers Waluigi and Wario are shoo-ins for inclusion in the Super Mario Bros. Movie, I personally will not rest until Nintendo has the guts to put Birdo — the MCU’s only canonically trans character — on the big screen, where she so clearly belongs.

Watch the trailer for The Super Mario Bros Movie below.