Stanley Tucci Made A Cocktail And Everybody Is Insanely Horny For Him
It's all in the forearms.
Maybe we are starved for content right now, or maybe Stanley Tucci is just ridiculously sexy, but the internet has gone hog-wild for a video of the actor making a Negroni on Instagram TV.
It’s the second option, clearly. Stanley Tucci has always been attractive. People have been sleeping on him and his forearms for TOO LONG.
Basically, the video consists of Stanley Tucci doing a cocktail masterclass, and walking us through his process of making a Negroni.
There’s not a lot more to it — he’s slyly charismatic, gently funny, and as everyone has found, stupidly hot. Why so hot???? Have a watch, and let’s work through it together.
May this video of Stanley Tucci doing a cocktail masterclass be a blessing upon your twitter feed. pic.twitter.com/62R1TjsAqA
— Nerd Girl Says (@Rachael_Conrad) April 21, 2020
being horny for stanley tucci making a negroni is base level horniness and being angry at the way stanley tucci makes a negroni is also horniness, it's just misdirected horny. that video might be the first 100% certifiable horny video in world history
— Joel Golby (@joelgolby) April 21, 2020
For me, a good part of the attraction is the blend (little cocktail joke there) of confidence and skill that Mr Tucci exhibits, which is always ambrosia for me. While some people have criticised him for “incorrectly” making the Negroni, in actual fact there’s no such thing.
He’s making it, confidently, exactly how he likes it, and that’s so attractive.
It also helps that it’s very similar to how I make mine, although I will steal that orange trick, it’s very aesthetically pleasing.
He’s also making the Negroni for his wife, which is truly delightful for me, someone who makes cocktails for the people I love. I want him to make me one. This is the logic.
I guess, in these troubling times, I am mostly horny for acts of human kindness! Imagine being in the same room as someone else! Imagine someone else making you the drinks you require to get through this.
everybody – literally every single adult human in the world – would fuck stanley tucci and if they say otherwise they're lying https://t.co/sPpzUjBD5T
— Jenna Guillaume⁷ (@JennaGuillaume) April 21, 2020
women only want one thing and its stanley tucci patiently making a cocktail and explaining each step as he does so
— Tilly Steele (@TillySteele) April 21, 2020
If Tom Hanks is America's Dad, then Stanley Tucci is your friend's dad that you lusted after for reasons that you'll spend all your relationships in your 20s figuring out
— Jenny Elder Moke (@jennyelder) April 21, 2020
I want Stanley Tucci to manhandle me the way he slams down his cocktail ingredients pic.twitter.com/W9Fg3YCQOV
— James Besanvalle (@JamesBesanvalle) April 21, 2020
However, we must simply get a lot more primal about this investigation. It’s all about the forearms, baby. There’s a controlled power to those bad boys, and they are extremely erotic to watch.
Please enjoy this poem that Philip Ellis wrote about Stanley Tucci’s forearms.
His little smile is also very effective.
An Ode to Stanley Tucci's Forearms
When Stanley's cooking dinner
his sleeves get in the way.
But when he rolls them up
it makes us feel some kind of way.It's not just that they're hairy,
or muscular, or tan.
It's all these things and more
that give us no choice but to stan. pic.twitter.com/tm0uIDx1aF— Philip Ellis (@Philip_Ellis) April 21, 2020
People have even made a new cut to help highlight all of this! Hooray for everyone being horny for Tucci!
Stanley Tucci making you a Negroni but with 350% more of Tucci’s arms and smile pic.twitter.com/ZLvxcX7r0v
— graham ross techler (@gr8h8m_t3chl3r) April 21, 2020