Ranking The Solo Careers Of One Direction, From Harry Styles To Everyone Else
Number one will (not) surprise you.
It’s been ten years since the formation of One Direction, one of the best boy bands in history, and the birthing site of at least two decent to great solo careers.
Yep, let’s just lay the controversial cards right on the table from the outset. After the band went on indefinite hiatus way back in 2017 and each of the five members tried to make it work on their own, their success rate was under 50 percent. For every ‘Watermelon Sugar’ there is an ‘Imprint’, and the lows of the solo careers far outweigh the highs.
To that end, let’s separate the trap-inflected chaff from the folky wheat, shall we, and rank the solo careers of the most lovable guitar-wielders in contemporary pop.
Dead Last: Zayn Malik
I caused a minor furore in the office when I insisted that Zayn Malik was the worst member of the band when he was in it, and an even worse musician when he stormed off in a huff and tried to hype his way into cultural capital. But sometimes, you have to stick to your intuitions, and my intuition tells me that Zayn Malik released one of the worst pop albums of the last three decades in Icarus Falls.
Listen, he might be a lovely guy, but he tried to take the shortest walk possible to the Billboard charts by wearing sub-Flume silky R&B like a fleshsuit. The most important thing in music is commitment, and I don’t think there’s a less committed musician than Zayn.
Ooft: Louis Tomlinson
Louis Tomlinson doesn’t rank so low on this list because of his music, mostly on account of the fact that his music doesn’t actually exist. Sure, he released a record this year, the dry-as-plaster Walls. But nobody listened to it. It was a tree falls in the forest kind of deal. ‘Kill My Mind’ is elevator music; ‘We Made It’ is a stringy serve of self-satisfaction; and ‘Take Me Back’ is two minutes of folk nonsense. Except ‘Take Me Back’ doesn’t exist, I literally just made it up, and I got away with it because not a single human being on the planet has listened to Walls all the way through and retained any memory of it.
No, Louis Tomlinson ranks in the second-to-last spot because he once used his platform to bully an Australian journalist, and generally acts like he has any kind of cultural relevance at all.
Getting There: Liam Payne
Liam Payne reckons he’s a Gallagher Brother. After all, he has spent his years as a solo artist releasing sub-par music and also slagging off his ex-bandmates, and how can you get more Gallagher Brother than that? He’s called himself the anti-christ version of Styles, which is rather presumptuous — he’s more like Harry Styles stripped off the charm and the interesting stuff.
But at least he’s generally kind of harmless. And despite the terrible reviews that it got, his first full-length LP1 has a nice sense of unity to it. Which is more than what you can say for something like Walls.
The Secret Genius: Niall Horan
Niall Horan has always been an assuming musician, both as a member of One Direction and after it. He doesn’t draw attention to himself with stunts or mouthy interviews. Instead, he just gets down to the business of writing and making music. In that way, he’s distinctly old school — more of a ’60s polymath like Lee Hazelwood than his showy One Direction bandmates.
More than that: his music’s actually good, which is the first time we’ve been able to say that about someone on this list. Heartbreak Weather is a work of trembling, emotional pop, and its titular track is good enough to let Niall get away with as many t-shirt and jeans photoshoots as he wants.
The Obvious Winner: Harry Styles
I mean, can you even imagine if this list was topped by any one else? Harry Styles could have amassed his current fanbase without ever being a member of a highly successful boyband. He’s just so much fun, and his music videos, singles, and albums are all defined by a sense of wit and energy that is sadly missing from so much pop music.
Better yet: he doesn’t even seem to have gotten himself fully started yet. Fine Line is great but uneven, in a way that implies that his greatest days are lying ahead of him. The joy of the next ten-years will be watching the man evolve into one of the chameleonic gamechangers of pop, a new Bowie for our times. Personally, I can’t wait.
Photo Credit: One Direction Facebook