Milo Yiannopoulos Launches Crowdfunding Campaign, Immediately Gets Shut Down
For $500 Milo will ring you on your birthday.
Alt-right wanker Milo Yiannopoulos has had a bit of a rough time lately. He’s been fired, dropped by his publisher, heckled out of bars and reportedly racked up more than $2 million in debt. So naturally, he did what all pathetic pseudo-celebrities do when they can’t accept their 15 minutes of fame are over: he tried begging for money on the internet. And hilariously, he managed to fuck that up too.
Yiannopoulos launched a Patreon page on Wednesday with plans to “come roaring back in 2019 with the fabulous comedy and insightful, serious commentary that made me famous in the first place.” Proceeds would have (supposedly) gone towards the creation of a “weekly late-night TV talk show to take back the culture, as well as future books, columns and college talks”.
That’s right folks, a TV show. And not just any TV show. “The greatest TV show in history”. Take that The Wire!
Unfortunately for Yiannopoulos, the good folks at Patreon apparently don’t take too kindly to dick pimples like him. And so, less than 24 hours after he started his campaign, it’s officially been shut down.
Hi there, thanks for the tweet. Milo Yiannopoulos was removed from Patreon as we don’t allow association with or supporting hate groups on Patreon. For more info, please see our Community Guidelines. https://t.co/L7737I1ENi
— Patreon (@Patreon) December 5, 2018
It’s a real tragedy for Milo fans, whose donations would have earned them everything from discounts on Milo merchandise to giant signed posters to a personal call from Milo on their birthday.
Some of the rewards in Milo’s new Patreon are unbelievably sad. For $750 bucks he will call you every year on your birthday, and give you 24/7 access to him via WhatsApp pic.twitter.com/wTXCPJyFsS
— Joe Bernstein (@Bernstein) December 5, 2018
For the rest of us, however, it’s just extremely funny.
Im so here to see Milo’s next failed scheme. Bake sale? Car wash?
— Oliver Butler ? (@oliverbutler) December 5, 2018
If you’re feeling down today, just imagine Milo having to get a real job like the rest of us.
— Sleeping Giants (@slpng_giants) December 5, 2018
Some advice for Milo. pic.twitter.com/LFgb68GW9J
— Toby. The G is silent. (@Epigrammist) December 5, 2018