Miley Cyrus Performed With A Lip-Syncing Kitten, And Other Highlights From The American Music Awards

When I was a kid, the American Music Awards were forever the shittiest installment of the annual music awards circuit. A poor young child would have to sit through endless segments of terrible country folks like Garth Brooks and Alabama retrieving undeserved prizes before even catching a glimpse of LL Cool J with right pants leg-raised or TLC draped in condoms.

While they still may not have the cultural clout of an MTV Awards show, today’s AMAs were as surprisingly enjoyable as you’d expect an awards show hosted by Pitbull to be (I guess?). Taylor Swift won something, Justin Timberlake won something, Macklemore and Ryan Lewis won something, and Miley Cyrus performed with a lip-syncing virtual kitten. Let’s get started, shall we?

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Lady Gaga rode in on a fake horse

“Aside from the horse and the whole craziness of it, she looks beautiful,” said E!’s red carpet commentators, ridiculously straight-faced.

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Yo Katy Perry, is this racist?

I think it might be racist.

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R. Kelly and Lady Gaga did a homage to the West Wing

You wouldn’t think a performance of the duo’s single ‘Do What U Want’ could get any crazier than that SNL sex-party they had last week, but oh, it did.

“WHO PUT THESE PICTURES ON INSTAGRAM?!”

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Rihanna was given the first ever ‘Icon Award’… by her mum

I hope Rihanna wasn’t stoned. Awkward!

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“Heeeeey, must be the money!”

This is some classic American Music Awards-type bullshit, featuring some country band called Florida Georgia Line that no one with good taste has ever heard of. But then Nelly’s ‘Ride Wit Me’ kicks in around the 2:30 mark, so it’s only mostly bad.

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One Direction stood around and yelled a lot

I think YouTube commenter Hannah Cooper says it best:

I have no idea what she’s talking about, but her angry passion has convinced me.

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Miley Cyrus performed with a singing virtual cat

Stick around to the very end, it’s so worth it.

Once again, Miley wins. Why don’t her people just lock her inside an awards show?

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