An American Turned A Kettle Into A “Pasta Strainer” And Australians Are Absolutely Fuming

Last year, the US finally discovered what kettles are and celebrated by drinking bucketloads of tea. But it seems that we’ve left the kitchen appliance with Americans for far too long because now they’re using kettles to cook pasta on the floor of college dorm rooms.

You see, on October 22 Arizona State University student Briana Sprinz accidentally offended thousands Brits and Aussies when she shared her dorm room cooking hack on TikTok.

“Living in a dorm makes it really hard to do things like making pasta but I saw one of these life hacks on TikTok where someone made pasta in one of these things,” Sprinz said referring to an electric glass kettle that she called a “water heaty up thing”.

After placing the “water heaty up thing” on the floor to boil, Sprinz cooked the pasta and then strained the hot water out using the spout.

“Isn’t that cool? It like strains for you… drain it? Strain or drain? I don’t know,” she continued her horrendous kettle journey before pouring cold, jarred pasta sauce on top. “Oh my God, so good.”

Unfortunately for Sprinz, horrified Aussies and Brits did not think the college student’s hack was “so good”, nor did they enjoy the fact that the American didn’t even know the appliance was called a kettle.

“Americans never fail to amaze me,” wrote one shocked Brit. “IT’S A KETTLE NOT A PASTA STRAINER.”

“I swear to God, if Americans start calling a kettle a pasta maker… that’ll be my 13th reason,” added an equally confused Aussie. “I’m gonna literally die if an American does one more thing.”

Even Italians were struggling with the thought of pre-made ravioli being plopped into cold water, that was heated in a vessel made for coffee and tea, and topped with cold, jarred sauce.

“This is every Italian’s villain origin story,” one person commented. “I’m Italian and I literally want to cry.”

Just watched an American cook pasta in a kettle,, this is my 13th reason

— mils (@porkophobic) October 23, 2021

after seeing a tiktok of some american making PASTA in a kettle and not knowing what a kettle is i am seriously shaken

— lucy (@Iehkonens) October 29, 2021

Thankfully, Sprinz was open to learning the real name for the “water heaty up thing” and how to properly use the appliance.

After her kettle pasta video was watched over five million times, Sprinz offered up a formal apology to “the people in the UK” for not using the item’s official name. But in doing so, she created a whole new issue: Calling the kettle a kittle.

“I got a lot of comments from people in the UK who told me it’s called a ‘kittle’ and they’re very mad at me for calling it a ‘water heaty upy thing’, so I’m very sorry,” Sprinz said in a TikTok last week. “I actually did that because I’ve never used one of these before for tea and coffee so I didn’t really know what it was called.”

So, trying to fix her previous mistakes, Sprinz then decided to use her “kittle” to make coffee as per the instructions of one commenter.

“It’s a kettle in Australia, we use it to boil water for coffee and tea and stuff like that,” the comment noted.

Totally misunderstanding the assignment, Sprinz painfully proceeded to pour both water and coffee directly into the kettle to boil together. The result? The college student getting a mouthful of gritty coffee grounds and watery coffee.

And at this point, it’s what she deserves — especially after Sprinz made Cheetos mac ‘n cheese directly in the kettle. Sauce and all. Truly blasphemous stuff.