Jon Lajoie’s Kickstarter Is One We Can All Get Behind
He wants to earn $500,000,000 and then he's not even gonna do anything with it.
Kickstarter, that heartwarming, green-accented miracle machine, has become the virtual manifestation of Mother Teresa in our times, an unlikely province of goodwill and charity and the ultimate expression of man’s generous spirit. It’s a bit like the collection plate at church, except the money goes towards making Adrien Grenier movies rather than boring church-y stuff.
Sure, Girls star Zosia Mamet’s recent attempt to earn $32,000 to produce ONE music video for her “unique brand of folk” band The Cabin Sisters may have failed dismally, but that was an anomaly in an otherwise positive trend of entitled types expecting their poor fans to fund their narcissistic pet projects.
Like many of us, Canadian comedian-actor-rapper-singer-musician-and-internet celebrity Jon Lajoie has been inspired by the incredible displays of altruism experienced by the likes of Zach Braff and Veronica Mars’ Rob Thomas. As a result, he’s launched his own Kickstarter campaign with one simple aim: to make him super rich.
“Yes, I’m rich,” he says in his project video, “but for the past few years now, I’ve been wanting to be super rich. Like Jay-Z rich. Unfortunately, that’s proven to be a little complicated. That’s where Kickstarter comes in.”
Lajoie’s goal: to raise $500,000,000 dollars in 90 days. (In case you’re confused by the unfamiliarity of so many zeroes, we’ll spell it out: that’s 500 million dollars. Yep, that still qualifies as ‘super rich’ these days.)
The rewards for contributors are extensive: For $20, Lajoie will give you “absolutely nothing, ’cause $20 don’t mean shit to rich people”; for $50, he’ll send you a photograph of himself “burning a $50 bill while riding a jet ski”, and for $1000, he’ll personally insult you on Facebook.
This could be one of your potential rewards.
“Please help me accomplish my dream of becoming super rich without having to compromise my sense of entitlement,” concludes Lajoie’s video. “I promise, I will not share this money with anyone.”
At the time of writing, he’s already achieved his goal, with hypothetical earnings of $10, 949, 728, 809.87 with 87 days of pledging to go. “We’ve reached our goal, but there’s no limit to the wealth gap between you and I. Keep donating…” says a post on his site.
We wish this was real.