Culture

Well, That Was Certainly Another Met Gala

by Charles Rushforth  2 May 2023

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Slumberers awake! It’s the 2023 Met Gala, the celebrity fashion event of the year that doesn’t stop until Jason Derulo falls down the stairs.

While this year’s theme, which is dedicated to Chanel designer Karl Lagerfeld has been rightly criticised due to the fashionista’s questionable stance on Muslim immigration and anyone over a size six, celebrities are still intent on wearing silly expensive things for us to gawk at from afar.

Doja Cat and Jared Leto Fight For Feline Supremacy

Sure, while invitations to the 2023 Met Gala specifically prescribed Karl Lagerfeld: A Line Of Beauty as the theme punters had to adhere to this year, celebrities sure seemed hell-bent on honouring Lagerfeld’s beloved cat Choupette. Both Doja Cat and Jared Leto put out their whole Choupussies into outfits inspired by the world’s most pampered pet, taking inspiration from The Masked Singer and the live-action Cats! remake respectively.

While I’m so sorry for the prior information this new knowledge has knocked out of your brain, I think you should also know that Aubrey Plaza wished that Jared Leto kept that darn mask on for longer! Crazy! Who needs long division, anyway?

Met Gala Cockroach Found Dead

Camera operators at the 2023 Met Gala briefly pulled a Terrence Malick as they raced to film the frenzied scurrying of an insect interloper. No, I’m not talking about Matthew Perry — a real-life cockroach was instantly memeified by eagle-eyed reporters from Variety as it attempted to strut its stuff.

Sadly, like a candle that burns twice as bright, this brave creature’s flame was quickly extinguished after being crushed by an unknown assailant.

Did Someone Hide A Dead Body At The 2023 Met Gala?

Employed by everyone from Cleopatra to the New Jersey mafia, rolling up a body within a reel of fabric is the most effective way to hide it from prying eyes. So what exactly is going on here?

The obvious answer is “it’s just a celebrity trying to surreptitiously yet fabulously evade the paparazzi, Charles”,  but honestly who knows? Are recently deceased celebrities being experimented on in a clandestine lab hidden underneath the grounds of the Metropolitan Museum of Art’s Costume Institute? Or was Jeremy Strong just not ready for you to see his shiny new pants yet?

Special Mentions: Lil Nas X’s Butt And Rhianna’s Supercheap Auto Sunnies

Stealing the limelight after arriving fashionably late, Rhianna looked stunning in a Maison Valentino gown complete with structured ivory top embroidered with rosettes. I’ve got to say, her sunglasses’ decals clearly swiped from Supercheap’s accessory section really helped pull the whole fit together.

While I didn’t see the cast of Subway Surfers papped on the red carpet this year, it sure is lovely that other mobile video game characters are being invited to attend the event.

Finally, in an attempt to break the tradition of men putting next to no effort into their appearance at the Met Gala, Lil Nas X went all out in this bejewelled tribute to Game Of Thrones’ White Walker. But despite all the labour that presumably went into the outfit, it’s this shot that makes it destined to endure the ages.

What a time. See you next year!

Image credit: Dimitrios Kambouris / Getty Images