People Are Sharing Their Most Embarrassing Sex Stories And Hoo Boy
If you haven't spoken in a 'Borat' voice during sex, have you ever truly lived?
Sex is a tricky thing — you can never get it 100% right and sometimes things out of your control just… happen.
Whether it’s a bodily function that did its own thing during the deed or you saying the wrong thing at the entirely wrong time, an embarrassing moment during sex is inevitable. So when @eerrriiicaa asked Twitter to share their embarrassing sex story to make her feel better, people delivered.
Starting with her own mortifying moment to get the ball rolling, Erica shared the time when she waved at the person giving her head when the pair made eye contact.
Please tell me your embarrassing sex stories so i feel better. I just thought about the time a few years ago when a guy went down on me and we made eye contact and I waved for some reason
— Erica (@eerrriiicaa) March 10, 2020
As expected, Erica wasn’t alone in her struggles. Turns out that doing strange things while people go down on each other is pretty normal.
Take @lentilslut’s unfortunate blowjob experience where she accidentally turned into Mike Wazowski while giving head. Or the time that @josie_gibsons’ sexual partner literally said *chefs kiss* to her vagina.
One time I tapped the tip like it was a microphone, said “is this thing on?” Like mike wazowskie in monsters inc, and then as I explained the reference he went flaccid
— （’∽’) ❀ (@lentilslut) March 11, 2020
One time a guy was going down on me and came up, looked me directly in the eye and said while doing this gesture:
“compliments to the chef” pic.twitter.com/Vr8yGG9iwr
— Josie Gibson (@josie_gibsons) March 10, 2020
But it’s not only that particular sex act that has yielded some cringe-worthy results. People also shared the awkward moments that happened during penetration like a mid-sex shift to Borat or a dude (believably) fucking a bed and not even noticing.
One guy asked me how I felt during it and I said “Very nice” in a borat voice ? ive never even seen borat
— Kaycee™️ (@kayceegilcrease) March 11, 2020
when i lost my virginity he didn’t even get it in me, he was having sex with my bed and didn’t even realize it, i wasn’t turned on, but i liked him so i let him continue having sex with my bed and never told him
— ••• (@maleahisabela) March 11, 2020
Then the cringe took a turn from awkward to the entertainingly gross when people started retelling stories about pesky tampons getting in the way of coitus or painfully mistaking hand sanitiser for lube.
One time I️ was rly drunk and hooking up with this guy and he went to fck and I’m like wait I️ have a tampon in, & he goes “nah I️ took it out?,” (so smooth like that) I️ was shooooook!! I’m like where … did u put it….. And then I️ saw it chilling on the floor. ??
— earthy leo (@exaltedmoon28) March 11, 2020
Grabbed hand sanitizer instead of lube and generously applied it in the dark
— Rhy (@Rhymanimal) March 11, 2020
But, honestly? Some of the stories were actually pretty endearing and probably ended in marriage so don’t let your “embarrassing” moment stop you from re-shooting your shot, y’all. Whether you fucked a bed or flung a tampon onto the floor, there’s always a little hope left.
dude was hittin it from behind and then stopped, got up, used his inhaler, then went right back to it like nothing happened
— chloe ? (@chloerhause) March 11, 2020
One time I got drunk with the girl I was dating at the time and she said “hurt me” and instead of like, slapping or spanking her I just pinched her really hard
— Kyle ? (@KylePlantEmoji) March 11, 2020
worked at a cinema & could take home bags of leftover popcorn. hooked up with this girl and knocked a full bag off my side shelf & onto her back. i couldn’t stop laughing, we cleaned up as much as we could & started again. 20 sec in & i catch her just lowkey snacking on popcorn
— sharon choi please step on me (@mattbzc) March 11, 2020
If you want to read the whole bonkers thread for yourself, you can do so here.