You Need To Read Cate McGregor’s Apology To The Trans Kids She Let Down By Opposing Safe Schools
"Many young trans people believed in me at one time. I had never fully grasped the extent of the hope that I had inspired in them."
When the furore over the Safe Schools program first kicked off in 2016, the program’s opponents gained an unlikely but powerful ally. Celebrated sports writer and Order of Australia member Cate McGregor penned an opinion piece titled “I am transgender. And I oppose Safe Schools”, and it was was used as a weapon to dismiss the voices of other trans people who said their lives depended on programs like Safe Schools.
Today, McGregor has apologised for that attack on Safe Schools, acknowledging for the first time the young trans people she let down when she wrote it. In an extraordinary opinion piece, she did what people are so rarely willing to do in heated debates like this: admitted she was wrong.
Her change of heart was spurred by encounters she had with young trans playwright and theatre-maker Charles O’Grady, who she worked with on the Sydney Theatre Company’s recent production of Still Point Turning, a play about McGregor’s life. McGregor wrote that O’Grady confronted her about her views on Safe Schools, telling her he resented her for them, and for her career in the military.
That confrontation could very easily have led to hatred and hard feelings, but in this case it didn’t. Rather, McGregor wrote, “I understood exactly why he felt as he did. He penetrated my defences and challenged me to review my own behaviour. Many young trans people believed in me at one time. I had never fully grasped the extent of the hope that I had inspired in them.”
“I dashed their hopes and broke their hearts over my criticism of Safe Schools. I was too selfish, too ideological and too combative. Frankly, I had felt manipulated at being asked to back a program whose most public face, Roz Ward, had denigrated the Australian Defence Force and was affiliated with Socialist Alternative in Victoria. I have never recanted from my opinion of her.”
Really hope @CateMc3273’s apology and acknowledgment of Safe Schools‘ importance is the start of all Australians understanding the initiative—launched with bipartisan support, reviewed and approved by independent experts—has always been about equipping teachers to put kids first.
— Benjamin Law (@mrbenjaminlaw) May 3, 2018
I have no words to describe how humbling this article, and my friendship with the immense and open-hearted @CateMc3273, has been. Art heals. <3 https://t.co/HTT9YjTXup
— charles o'grady dot net (@gharlesochady) May 3, 2018
McGregor then went a step further, apologising directly for her mistake.
“In light of the harm I did to many and the friendships that I lost, I deeply regret my actions,” she wrote. “I wish to apologise to all those I harmed or disappointed. I made a mistake and threw the baby out with the bath water. Fame and public attention came rapidly to me when my transition became news. I lacked the maturity and depth to handle it with the grace and aplomb that those to whom I became a beacon deserved.”
This is brave, generous and beautiful. Thank you, @CateMc3273 Here’s to forgiveness and open hearts. You have both from me xhttps://t.co/RYq4LDZRix
— Sally Rugg ?️? (@sallyrugg) 3 May 2018
Sadly, it's too late for Safe Schools, and the damage McGregor did cannot be undone. The battle for Safe Schools was the rehearsal for the postal survey, and both emboldened our opponents. I hope now that McGregor throws her influence behind us. All of us.
— Nic Holas (@nicheholas) May 3, 2018
This is not a perfect apology — McGregor’s comments on Roz Ward, for one, have continued to draw criticism — but it’s also an extraordinary moment. The debate over Safe Schools, which is literally just a program equipping students and teachers with the understanding necessary to not make LGBTIQ+ kids’ lives hell, has been ugly and relentless for months. Once the postal survey raised the stakes, there was little to no chance of its opponents backing down.
Until now, it seems. For Cate McGregor to so publicly admit she was wrong about this is rare, and important. Perhaps now, months after the postal survey came to an end, we’re finally beginning to find the space for things like apologies, and forgiveness, and a proper conversation about how our schools can better support LGBTIQ+ kids.