Culture

Here’s A Reminder Of All The Things That Have Actually Happened In 2020

It’s been a long-ass year and it's only July.

by Michelle Rennex  20 July 2020
2020 in review

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There’s no denying that 2020 has been a total mess, and somehow both the longest and shortest year ever.

While we all complained about March going on for about five years itself, the months since have zoomed on by. So much so that there’s actually only 23 weeks until 2020 is over and 2021 begins — which means we’re already over half way through this cursed year.

But as our lives have been taken over by bushfires, COVID-19 and global Black Lives Matter protests, there’s things that have happened in the last few months that have been long forgotten. So let’s take a trip down memory lane, shall we?

January

  • WWIII memes took over: After American forces killed Iran’s Major General Qasem Soleimani on January 3, the world was certain that we were headed for World War III in 2020. To cope, everyone just made a whole lot of memes.
  • Celeste Barber raised over $50,000,000 for bushfire relief: Also on January 3, after posting a Facebook fundraiser for the NSW Rural Fire Service and Brigades Donations Fund, comedian Celeste Barber somehow managed to raise $49,970,000 more than her original goal of $30,000.
  • Megxit rocked the world: While it feels like Prince Harry and Meghan Markle left the Royal Family years ago, they actually only announced their departure from their duties as senior royals on January 8.
  • Netflix’s Cheer was released: Even though watching the ups and downs of the cheerleaders at Navarro felt like it happened in another lifetime, the series only actually came out on January 8 too.
  • Canberra was destroyed by a giant hailstorm: Following weeks of bushfires, Canberra was hit with hail the size of golf balls, which resulted in major property damage on January 20.
  • Kobe Bryant and his daughter tragically died: On January 26, the world was rocked when news of Kobe and Gigi Bryant’s death — by helicopter crash — was confirmed.
  • Brexit finally happened: On January 31, three and a half years after the UK voted to leave the European Union, the UK officially withdrew after a 47-year membership .

February

  • Shakira’s tongue at the Super Bowl became a meme: On February 3, Shakira and Jennifer Lopez performed at the 54th Super Bowl, where Shakira’s tongue became a very strange meme.
  • Parasite won at the Oscars: To show you just how long this God forsaken year has been, Bong Joon-Ho won an Oscar for Best Director and Parasite bagged Best Picture on February 10.
  • Love Is Blind premiered: It feels like we were introduced to Jessica’s sexy baby voice and the cast’s oddly vague job titles years ago, but the show actually only came out on February 13, 2020!
  • Quaden Bayles was bullied and went viral: On February 19, Quaden Bayles became a household name when a video of him crying after being bullied went viral. Then debunked conspiracy theories that Quaden was “actually 18” started to spread like wildfire after $400,000 was raised for the child to go to Disneyland.
  • The Great Baboon Escape: On February 25, three wild baboons ran amuck at Sydney’s Royal Prince Alfred hospital parking lot when they escaped during vasectomy surgery transport.

March

  • The Chats unearthed the Succulent Chinese Meal man: On March 6, The Chats recruited the Succulent Chinese Meal man for their ‘Dine N Dash’ music video, which basically sent Australia into a spin.
  • Coronavirus was declared a pandemic: While it does feel like coronavirus has been knocking around for years, WHO only declared COVID-19 a pandemic on March 11.
  • Harvey Weinstein was finally sentenced: After accusations of harassing more than 80 women, Weinstein was sentenced to 23 years in prison on March 12.
  • Gal Gadot and co. sang ‘Imagine’: In the world’s most tone-deaf video, Gal Gadot gathered all her very rich friends to sing John Lennon and Yoko Ono’s ‘Imagine’ in response to COVID-19 on March 19.
  • Tiger King dropped on Netflix: Turns out Joe Exotic’s mullet and Carole Baskin’s flower crown have only really been public knowledge for about four months. Yep, the big cat docuseries only came out on March 20.
  • Animal Crossing: New Horizons was released: In the midst of the pandemic — aka also on March 20 — Nintendo released New Horizons, which gave people a much needed mental break and spurred on a bunch of memes. Hell, even Elijah Wood started visiting people’s islands to sell his turnips.

General things that happened throughout March, the longest month that has ever existed in the history of the world: People became obsessed with making Dalgona whipped coffee and everyone got hooked on using Houseparty during lockdown.

April

  • People started stanning Kim Jong-un’s sister: After not being seen in public since April 11, reports started swirling online that North Korean leader, Kim Jong Un, had died. In response, people begun to stan his sister, Kim Yo-Jong. Thank God that stopped.
  • The Giant Baby broke the internet: On April 21, the Giant TikTok baby made its way to Twitter and absolutely horrified people who couldn’t figure out the child’s size, age or real purpose.
  • The Normal People series dropped: On April 26, Sally Rooney’s show adaption of Normal People made its way online and everyone quickly fell in love with Connell and his dumb little chain.
  • UFO videos were released: The Pentagon literally released three declassified videos, captured by navy pilots, that showed unidentified flying objects on April 27. And no one blinked an eye, which shows you how numb 2020 has made us.
  • Britney Spears burnt down her home gym: Britney Spears announced she burned down her home gym with two candles on April 29. Iconic, honestly.

May

  • Grimes gave birth: Billionaire Elon Musk and musician Grimes had their baby on May 4 and controversially, and stupidly, named him X Æ A-X12. But to follow Californian law, the couple ~updated~ their son to X Æ A-Xii for legal reasons later in the month.
  • Monkeys on motorcycles kept terrorising children: Yeah, May 2020 was a weird month. Also kicking off on May 4, videos of monkeys on tiny motorbikes either plowing over children in the streets or trying to kidnap them kept going viral.
  • Channel 7 sacked Pete Evans: Even though Pete Evans has been on his ridiculous shit for ages, Channel 7 only sacked him from My Kitchen Rules, and the network, on May 7.
  • Alison Roman and Chrissy Teigen started beefing over food: Also on May 7, food influencer Alison Roman did an interview with The New Consumer, where she criticised Chrissy Teigen and Marie Kondo for capitalising on their brands, despite doing the very same thing herself. This kicked off 2020’s most unseasoned beef yet.
  • People accused Hilary Duff of sex trafficking her son: Wild conspiracy theories involving Hilary Duff started to swirl online on May 23, when the actor accidentally shared — and promptly deleted — a photo of her son on her Instagram story.
  • A YouTuber “rehomed” her adopted son with autism: On May 27, YouTuber Myka Stauffer made headlines when she shared that she “rehomed” the son she adopted from China when his special needs became too much for the family to handle.

Other things that happened in May: George Floyd was killed by police and sparked worldwide Black Lives Matter protests, Murder Hornets scared people in the US and 50 Cent fought with a Melbourne graffiti artist all month long.

June

  • K-Pop stans used their powers for good: Despite stan culture often doing more bad than good, K-Pop stans banded together, from June 1, to take down snitch police watch apps and even eventually totally tank Trumps Tulsa rally with TikTok teens later in the month.
  • “I yield my time, fuck you!” went viral: Following the protests seeking justice for George Floyd, the LAPD held a public Zoom call to address questions from the public on June 2. As expected, they were dragged to absolute filth, but Jeremy Frisch’s searing 28-second “I yield my time, fuck you!” call went viral for obvious reasons.
  • Everyone got very horny over 365 Days: Netflix dropped 365 Days on June 7, and it spurred on the horniest month of 2020. Between Massimo’s “babygorl”, that boat sex scene and all the TikTok teens turning it into one big horny joke, 365 Days shot into Netflix’s top three in over 25 countries.
  • Sohla El-Waylly exposed Bon Appétit for pay inequity: All anyone could talk about in June was how Sohla deserved more. After photos of Bon Appétit’s then-editor-in-chief in brownface resurfaced, Sohla blew everything up by admitting she was only earning $50,000/year on June 9. Bon Appétit haven’t uploaded a video since.
  • Officer Karen cried over a late McMuffin: Deputy Stacy Talbert went viral for all the wrong reasons when she shared a tearful video to her Facebook account on June 17. Being dubbed Officer Karen by the internet, the cop thought the inconvenience of having to wait three minutes for her breakfast order was essentially police abuse and signs of food tampering.
  • Shredded Cheese Wife Guy was torn to (cheese) shreds: Jason Vicknair and his wife became the laughing stock of the internet when Jason tweeted about poor food service mid-pandemic on June 28. Upset over the lack of shredded cheese available for his fajita-loving wife, memes about shredded cheese, or rather the lack of, rounded out the month of June.

So, there you go — what a long half-year it’s been! I don’t really know how much more can happen over the next six months of 2020, but I am scared.