The ABC’s ‘7.30’ Has Roasted Politicians Who Pretend To Be Human By Liking Sport
"Without being able to talk about footy, how are we as politicians supposed to manipulate the general public?"
Canberra is in the grips of a major crisis. Fortunately, the ABC’s newest contributor is on the case. In his first satirical segment for 7.30, comedian Mark Humphries has taken aim at the biggest problem facing our nation’s politicians right now: with the football season finished, how will they pretend to be actual human beings?
“The mood in Canberra at the moment is one of utter despair,” Humphries explains at the beginning of the segment. “I mean worse than the usual despair you feel from being in Canberra.”
“Without being able to talk about footy, how are we as politicians supposed to manipulate the general public into believing that we’re just ordinary citizens picking up our bread and milk at the Woolies or Doolies or whatever it’s called?” he asks. “It’s a particularly tough time for the Prime Minister, because whenever he was up against the ropes in an interview, he could just say ‘Go Sharkies’.”
“Sport is an undeniable characteristic of the everyday Australian. Unfortunately. But it does help break down some of the barriers in our society,” Humphries adds. “For instance, whenever I encounter ordinary Australians because I’m forced to open a Bunnings or some bullshit, I can say to them, ‘look, I may be a Rhodes Scholar, I may be on $350,000 a year, but at the end of the day, you and I both barrack for the Manly Sea Cucumbers, and that’s why you’ll vote for me, you meathead’.”
You can watch the full sketch below.
What will politicians do now that the footy season is over? @markhumphries takes a look in his first satirical piece for #abc730. #auspol pic.twitter.com/xSH9r7R3lX
— abc730 (@abc730) October 4, 2018
Mark Humphries will appear on 7.30 once a fortnight going forward. I guess Leigh Sales’ comedic timing just wasn’t up to scratch.