Dylan J Sucks: “I Think Life’s Just Sometimes Incredibly Unfair”
Melbourne’s Dylan J has lived many lives as a musician. First emerging as a rapper in the early 2010s, his pivot to pop showed off his full range. His 2015 album Authentic Lemonade is a time capsule of mid-2010s Australian hip-hop, arriving just before artists here started making trap and drill music en masse. His recent releases — which are much more informed by sounds from the pop world — suggest an artist who has come into his own.
He’s just shared the passionate ‘FUCK THE INTERNET’. While it’s fun and a little fiery, the track shares a sentiment I can’t fully get behind. You are reading my stuff on the internet, after all. In reality, though, the track is less about the internet itself, and more about the its ability to affect our relationships. We caught up with Dylan to chat about jumping off a cliff in Ontario, ASMR TikToks and partying. (If you’ve ever ended up with a bloody nose after a lake dive, you’ll agree with Dylan: it absolutely sucks.)
Junkee: A mistake that turned into an opportunity?
One time I accidentally signed up for dance class as a kid, thinking it was breakdancing and hip-hop. It was a female-only class, but they let me stay. I ended up doing the whole season (only boy in the group) and outside of it probably building my confidence dancing with girls, it was also super fun. Probably some footage somewhere I’ll never try dig up.
Cringe quote you used to live by?
“Everything happens for a reason.” Some people probably still live by this, but as time goes on for me, I can’t justify that some people go through extreme trauma or death for some greater purpose. I think life’s just sometimes incredibly unfair.
Worst advice you got and blindly followed?
To jump off a 20-metre high cliff into a lake in Ontario. Impact from the water gave me a blood nose for hours.
Embarrassing internet habit?
Listening to random ASMR TikTok videos to fall asleep and occasionally getting woken up to someone eating really aggressively.
Ideal morning routine versus actual morning routine?
Not gonna lie, I’m pretty good at doing these things. But: Sitting in the sun for half an hour as soon as I wake up, smashing out a little gratitude meditation, going to the gym or for a run, drinking a banging homemade smoothie, showering up, picking an outfit and then do the things I need to.
Something very off-brand for you?
Probably just partying, pretty hard sometimes. I’m a ‘don’t party often, but when I do, go hard’ kind of person. I feel like people think I spend all my time helping old ladies cross the road. Really I’m at a club, probably trying to flirt with all the hot mums.
Bad health decision?
Overeating when something’s fucking delicious.
What do you waste money on?
Subscriptions. I feel like I have 100 of them that I can’t track down and I probably never use.
Worst procrastination habit?
Making or editing artwork. I have some weird obsession with design work, even though I’m probably terrible at it. And if there’s anything that needs editing, I’ll do that every single time, before I do anything else important.
Dylan J’s new single FUCK THE INTERNET is out now.
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Illustration credit: Matt Lauricella, @pigeonboyart